http://www.cancerchat.org.uk/clearspacex/index.jspa All Content in Cancer Research UK Forum en Fri, 09 Apr 2010 00:41:19 GMT Clearspace 1.10.3 (http://jivesoftware.com/products/clearspace/) 2010-04-09T00:41:19Z en http://www.cancerchat.org.uk/clearspacex/message/15137 Hi Sorcha<br /> <br /> Just a thought but perhaps your answer to coping may well be continuing to post on this forum. As you said "Not to feel alone is the best part of this forum" and I really think you are right. Its a rare environment where you get to share your innermost thoughts and fears and get completely honest and well informed advice back from people that really understand what you are going through.<br /> <p /> <br /> My father had stomach cancer which he beat after 3 years in 2009 whilst very sadly, my Mum passed away just last week from Mesothelioma. <br /> <p /> <br /> One thing I noticed with both of them was they constantly tried to protect my sister and I because they were afraid to worry or hurt us. I recognised quickly that actually this was their own way of coping and whilst in the short term it didn't really help me actually cope, in a wierd way I eventually took great comfort from it. <br /> <p /> <br /> Anyway, i hope my thoughts help, keep posting (perhaps cancer Chat should allow members to create a personal blog space which could become a great coping mechanism for sharing thoughts/concerns etc and generally getting things off our chests ?)<br /> <p /> best of luck<br /> <p /> Mike Fri, 09 Apr 2010 00:40:35 GMT mikee http://www.cancerchat.org.uk/clearspacex/message/15137 2010-04-09T00:40:35Z 5 months, 9 hours ago 4 http://www.cancerchat.org.uk/clearspacex/message/13926 Hi,<br /> <br /> I've had 2 lots of counselling and cbt as i developed a mild form of anorexia..i say mild as i was treated as an outpatient and gained weight while keeping up with a part time job and uni work. Wasn't easy but so worth it ! Mum's always told me my reactions have been normal and its OK to feel upset/angry/frustrated etc...its just that as its been 10 years i'm surprised it hasnt got much easier. <br /> I'm a language student so i've spent 6 months in Argentina and i'm now in Strasbourg..being away from home makes you think about your priorities..especially as i'm planning my future career and applying for internships. I want a career in marketing in London.. finally my self awareness is paying off, i know exactly what i want and that means i've got a clear goal to aim for. Patience is something i'm working on...i find it all to easy to generalise and feel depressed. Most days i tell myself everyone has problems and just to get on with the day but on days that i can't get going i write everything down..i'm often surprised i haven't got more to do. My imagination always makes things much worse... <br /> Mum has herseptin every 3 weeks and of course scans to check for the cancer..basically if it mutates then we're in trouble. So far its been 5 years and it hasn't changed..its just everyone else hasn't survived it so it feels like a cruel waiting game. Of course we may be extremely lucky..i just can't tell myself that the cancer has gone away..the pain it would cause if it did come back would be too much. I prefer to take a realistic approach and stay balanced. <br /> take care, Mon, 08 Mar 2010 18:54:24 GMT Sorcha http://www.cancerchat.org.uk/clearspacex/message/13926 2010-03-08T18:54:24Z 6 months, 1 day ago 8